Easy Fluffy: YGO
by CosmicEssence
Summary: A humorprank drabble series around a similar idea. The hikari's are fed up with their yami's. We ALL have our limits.
1. Funhouse? Light vs Dark

**Easy Fluffy: YGO **

**Warnings: Random, drabble. OOCness and silliness likely. Going off what most people tend to have Malik is Hikari and **_Marik _**Yami, cause yeah I do know about all that stuff as well.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh. I do not own 'Phantom of the Opera' by Andrew Lloyd Webber either.**

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"**Talking" 'Thinking' **

"_**Talking in background or not main focal point"**_

"_Emphasized_**"**

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**Funhouse? Light vs. Dark**

"**This is stupid. Must they fight **_every_** single **_time_**!?"**

"**You would think after 5000years, plus a few, they could get over it and get along?!"**

"_**PHARAOH!"**_

"**Ugh my head" Ryou said gripping his temples in pain "Must they be so loud? Can't they be quiet for 5 measly minutes?"**

"_**OI!"**_

"**_Screw you Tomb Robber that is none of your concern!"_**

"_**Concern?! For who? You?!"**_

**Three droopy-eyed hikari's sat facing their yami's take another chunk out of each other – without physically doing so which might have been more satisfying to watch – for the most stupidest of reasons again. This time Yami, Bakura and Marik had gotten into another pointless argument that escalated into **_who knows what_**. Today it had started from Marik's curiosity with an electric whisk, another of the wonderful, **_and what_** would we do without of modern appliances. Honestly the world was too excessive with its material and inefficient wealth. **

**Apparently the platinum blond had thought it some kind of skin exfoliator and scratcher despite being told by a not-so delusional other half that it mixed and blended food, like fruit. Of course that then proceeded with multiple sorry attempts to 'blend' whole fruit from the fruit bowl.**

**Somehow Bakura had gotten involved upon each light meeting up as they often did – naturally bringing their darkness' along to keep them in 'line' – a disagreement started up contributing one former pharaoh as well.**

**Perhaps all three were highly restless from the lack of any real action as of late; no fun or challenge obviously equalled uncontrollable insane yami's. A notion that was quickly driving their hikari's and everyone in their vicinity up the proverbial wall…although most thought Jou was attempting to run up the school wall as a means of escaping his backed in corner when he turned around and crashed into it the other day.**

"**This has to stop."**

"**I know Malik but I've been down right shouting at Yami through our link and for once he isn't listening."**

"'**Kura tends not to listen to anything of interest when he is fighting" said Ryou head down still attempting to massage away his migraine.**

"**Mine probably can't hear me over all the 'other' voices in that **_block_** head of his!"**

'**_No, No I said'_**

'**_I don't care what you said thief'_**

'**_You are hopeless'_**

"**If they do not **_stop_** soon my head is going to **_split_** in three…or I will do **_something_** I will regret later…"**

"**Hey yeah that's it you two!"**

"**Huh what's it?...Malik?"**

"**You want to get them back right? For these past weeks."**

"**Yeah I guess"**

"**Ryou?"**

"**Anything as long as they are quiet."**

"_Anything's good_**. Not only do we get some silence we get them back for all their snappy attitudes – Marik's been real hell lately…well more than I'm used to..."**

"**Snappy? Um…Yami's definitely been moody…and every time he has had an argument he likes to rant about it for ages afterwards, especially if Bakura's rubbed him wrong."**

"**Eww. Yugi…that didn't sound right…"**

"**I'm just up for some peace. The ability to actually relax and not have to worry about 'Kura flying off his handle. If you've got an idea Malik lets hear it."**

**Shimmering closer on the large couch a vindictive whispered conference whips up from three unlikely sources...**

"**Alright fluffy…"**

"**Who you calling 'fluffy'…and why?" Ryou asked pulling a puzzled 'what-the-hell' face.**

"**Your hair…" Malik pointed.**

"**What's wrong with my hair?!" questioned the albino, indignantly while twirling his front strands.**

"**It's…fluffy."**

"**It is kind of yeah"**

"**Oh? This coming from Mr. Porcupine?"**

"**Hey! My hair is naturally like this!"**

"**Really? Ever heard of gravity?"**

"_I __have actually_**."**

"**Yugi, Ryou – your beginning to sound like them" pointedly gesturing to their darkness's.**

"**Sorry"**

"…**Sorry"**

"**You see! It's a plague! And their spreading it to us! Its damn time to get our own back."**

"**I swear that's the name of some TV show I saw once" mumbled Yugi spacing out for a moment.**

**Both the tri-coloured and white haired boys looked at one another then back at the blonde before simultaneously enquiring "So…"**

"**Its time to give them hell back!" a little too enthusiastically and as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.**

"**Ah…what?"**

"**Look the way I figure it their not listening to their own but we are going to have to make them listen. So I think they will pay more attention if we swap around; it would be far more noticeable if Yugi took on Marik."**

"**I'm not taking on Marik! I would rather tussle with Bakura any day!"**

"**Okay okay so you take the tomb robber, which means Ryou…"**

"**I don't mind Marik – I've had far too many bad dealings with the Pharaoh already."**

"**So have I, more than you in fact, but you don't see me whinging." Malik smirked.**

"**I am not whinging I am just saying. Anyway your logic wouldn't work if I took Yami now would it?"**

"**Um so what do we mean guys by 'bringing hell'?"**

**-----------------------------**

**Ten minutes later, Yami's had still not stopped and Malik, Ryou and Yugi had congregated in Ryou's ransacked kitchen.**

"**So basically we are going to make a mess?...Sorry a bigger mess than the one currently in my kitchen?"**

"**Short of whacking them over the head…"**

"**Which wouldn't work."**

"…**this is the only thing to do right now."**

"**You mean…it was the only thing you could think of."**

"**That too."**

"**And who might I ask is going to clean this crap up."**

"**They are of course!"**

"**Riiight. Right after we've dumped it over their heads…You are as delusional as ever."**

"**Hey. You want a permanent solvent for your headache or what?!"**

"**Ryou's just taken some aspirin."**

"**Yugi, aspirin will not do any good if the cause of that migraine isn't silenced. 'Sides this is only the first step. Now we doing this or what?" **

**Sighing, the albino moved to the fridge and a half opened juice carton "Marik doesn't like oranges correct?"**

"**That's the spirit." **

"_Not_** funny" Ryou growled, his head not helped by the blond psycho in front of him.**

"**Hmmm. Icing sugar, flour, treacle…no strawberry syrup…" **

**Both blond and albino ogled at their tri-coloured haired companion vaguely wondering why he had chosen those 'ingredients' for Ryou's yami.**

"**What? I figure Bakura could do with sweetening up a bit. We are going to gunk them after all – some of it should seep in" Yugi said smiling brightly.**

"**Er…sure" sweat dropped Malik "Hey is there anything in particular that…"**

"**Chocolate or milk. Especially rotten milk" Yugi replied.**

**Three minutes and thirteen seconds later one pint jug, one blender bowl and a large bowl were filled with liquidised – well mostly – foodstuff that could pass for funhouse gunge any day. Yugi's concoction may even have tasted nice if it weren't for the three slightly off eggs posing salmonella risk he had added in.**

**Ryou's had orange juice, lemon juice, gelatine, treacle, mashed up orange pieces and soda creating a very sweet and sour fruity mixture that would go nicely with the yami's personality.**

**While Malik's looked a bit like chocolate milk. Indeed it had melted chocolate, warmed milk, porridge oats and flour giving the drinkable liquid an off texture, some gravy granules and the rest of the eggs all blended up together. **

**Their darks were in for a **_yummy_** treat.**

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**Back in the lounge Bakura, Yami and Marik were still at it – Ra knows what they could possibly dispute over for so long as it had been way over an hour. **

**It was clearly high time to silence the wolves.**

**A good job perhaps that they were so reclusive of everyone but themselves; former pharaoh positioned in the middle with his back to the main room, Bakura to his left and Marik to his right, each forming a mini semi circle that blocked their background surroundings and subsequently their steadily approaching hikari's who were all ready in line with their intended victims.**

**Ryou was suddenly not very concerned over the mess he and his friends were about to make after all they all needed a respite and it was a wonder the neighbours had not complained yet. He noticed their complete lack of attention – they could probably have ballet danced, gunk's held high in the air while singing The Phantom of the Opera at the top of their voices and their ignorant extremely annoying yami's would still not have noticed them.**

**They stopped in front – or rather behind – them, strangely calm not suppressing any form of giggle or noise just steadfastly determined to end the din. Slowly surely they moved the containers around, up and pouring right down onto their 'poor' unsuspecting dark's. Yugi's concoction landed first spilling all over Tomb Robber's hair, face and upper body splattering his own dark very slightly in the process. His own dark that a split second before being covered in Malik's mix and again splattered by Ryou's as it glued onto Marik, turned in surprise to his little light.**

"**Wha…Yugi? Urgh…"**

"**What?" Bakura whipped around, dumbly staring stunned and followed by an equally bewildered Tomb Keeper to the former's light. Each was now blankly staring wide-eyed and shocked at three very collected teens, wondering distantly what had just happened.**

"**Fluffy…I don't think it worked" said Yugi looking at a slightly sour note upon the older albino's face.**

"**You probably didn't use enough sugar porcupine."**

"**What you mean it didn't work?! I think it worked like a charm!"**

"**He isn't talking about that **_Mal_**."**

"**Oh…ohhh…should have used chocolate."**

"**You think so" glancing at his blond friend as Malik scrounged up some brown stuff from Yami's shoulder and flicked it on Bakura's face, utterly failing to get any reaction as the albino continued to bug-eyed stare confused.**

"**I think you would need more than that." Ryou countered disinterestedly, glancing slightly to his left.**

"**Um yeah. But hey I like what you did with that orange mix. It blends really well. I bet you could start a new fashion trend…" **

"**Only if Ryou can remember what he put in it." Yugi added.**

"**What? Hair á la orange? I honestly don't think it will catch on guys." He replied turning away with Malik and then Yugi momentarily following as they moved from Ryou's lounge.**

"**Is your headache any better Ryou?"**

"**Hm? Yeah…it's gone down a bit, thanks Yugi!"**

"**That's good then…you want to play cards?"**

"**No duelling."**

"**Afraid you'll lose **_Mal_**."**

"**Shut up!"**

"**No I was thinking normal quiet cards."**

"**Hey can we play poker?"**

"**How do you…"**

**Their voices eventually faded away as they got further from their previous transgressions leaving said hazards still too bemused and stunned to do, say or currently think anything on the whole subject. They did however register – **_finally_** – that the second they had turned around their scheming hikari's had shoved the gunk containers into their hands and that said gunk was steadily dripping to the floor around their frozen feet.**

**-**

**Owari!**

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**Anyway don't forget to _review_ and tell me how I do! Hey that rhymes! Criticisms, comments heck even flames are welcome if you want to mean about it…**

**CosE.**


	2. Don't poke me, I'll poke you

**Title: Easy Fluffy: YGO2**

**Extended Summary: Followed from chapter one. Start of multiple chapters of Ryou, Malik and Yugi 'getting their own back' against increasing torment from their barely controllable, increasingly annoying and highly restless Yami's. Bored with the constant animosity between Yami, Bakura and Marik; the 3 Hikari's and their friends come up with a plan to **_make_** them get along. But are they properly considering the consequences? And will they actually get away with it? Here's hoping nothing backfires oO**

**Warnings: ummm nothing just a slow start-up and one or two mild swear words.**

**Disclaimer: Do not own Yugioh. Or Super Smash Bros. Melee by Nintendo, everything to do with these are TradeMarked (TM). E.G. MewtwoTM since the higher placed mark doesn't work with my system...:p**

**Note: "Talking"'Ryou Thinking' **

**A/N: Non-canon/post really. Obviously. Just one of those non-serious what if they had remained stories. They have bodies but are still heavily connected to the items and are essentially still spirits just not in dire need of hosts (can disappear fully into items still and mind-linked with their others). Powers also still present but in a slightly less potent state and heavily influenced by the presence of the items. Just thought I'd clear that up—it'll be needed later. In this Yami-Yugi's name is Yami Atemu because, meh just because…!**

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**Don't poké me, I'll poké you.**

**It had been a week since the random dunking of kitchen substance that had briefly caused a respite in terms of the yami's. Now it seemed as though the incident had never even occurred. Whatever message the three lights wanted to put across no matter how unclear it actually was, seemed to have had no effect at all. A fact along with the unfortunate notion of living without their other halves would be a pain despite desperately wanting to try right then.**

**As it happens, they, along with their darks and Jounouchi, Anzu, Honda, Mai and Shizuka were at the arcade trying to relax from school. Yet once again – could they not go somewhere **_together _**without it resulting in bloodshed? – they were at it again.**

**Bakura and Marik had challenged the former Pharaoh to a game of Super Smash Brothers MeleeTM since one on one had never really worked in the winning factor. From the sounds of it and from what Jounouchi managed to get out of them, the tomb duo had been on the brink of winning when their tri-coloured hair opponent had pulled a fast one and beat them by producing SuicineTM and UnknownTM all at once, simultaneously followed by a very large explosion. In the game practically anything went anyway so there was nothing wrong with Yami's sudden comeback of lethal resources – if anything his opponents should have been paying more attention to the multitude of pokéballsTM being thrown at them – and the fact that both yami's were blown right off the makeshift Battlefield StageTM was just…well…coincidence. Except…**

**Bakura and Marik happened to disagree and claimed the 'all-mighty-bastard-Pharaoh' had rigged his side of the game during set-up and therefore cheated. They supposed at least indifference to every two against one assaults and the fact that in one of their two out of three matches, Marik's RoyTM had dealt a 'traitorous' blow involving a lightsabre to Bakura's character MewtwoTM instead of Yami's choice of Adult LinkTM, which meant a round robin of all for one and **_no_** one for all!**

**Mai had cleverly – really its not that hard – suggested they replay with no teams and settle things that way. It took some convincing but eventually a highly indignant Yami "There **_is_** no need to cheat against you two!", an annoyed Marik and a pissed-off-I'm-going-to-break-bones-in-a-minute Bakura reattempted to prove who was best at the childish game. Though how they planned on doing that with only a couple of go's Osiris' Kingdom only knows.**

**This time around and right before the moment where everyone scrambled outside, lest they get caught in the backlash and end up having to pay any form of damage compensation; Yami played Princess ZeldaTM , Marik GanondarfTM and Bakura Donkey KongTM …possibly thinking the big mean monkey would crush the pretty princess. That was until he realised she had two personalities as well as her little lightshow packing a sharper blow than expected. One could suppose the following explosion racked up to the tomb robber's upset over being beaten by a 'girl'…then again a few sparks seemed to come from Yami when he blamed his blatant self-suicidal fall over the side of the float on Marik's **_failure _**to pick up the parasol, instead of sidestepping to the next float, which he did.**

**None of the others seemed remotely impressed by how things were turning out; I mean there was male testosterone and then there was just plain silly stupidity. There was beginning to be a general consensus of how irritating and how much of a nuisance the three darkness's were turning out to be – especially when all they did was fight and moan about the other to everyone else the remainder of the time. Though Ryou did point out at least they weren't trying to kill one another anymore…and that was supposed to be a bonus??**

**They were bored, restless…least that was the impression each gave off and their friends were just as bored playing dodgeball – a weird version of the game wherein every time someone thought of one of the yami's or went somewhere with one, they would have to watch out for the siding, 'defending' and attacking yami balls flying in every direction. The hikari's were certainly not prepared to keep trying to avoid each other or the others, depending on which yami was with which person each time around, simply to reduce damages. It was needless to say really…everyone was at their tolerance limits.**

**General consensus: _No more_.**

**Those spirits – never mind how **_old_** they were – would get along (at least in part) or else suffer the consequences. **

**If last week's wholly stupid idea did not work (big surprise!) then it was time to bring in the big guns!**

**The other 'non-spirits' would have their peace of mind; Marik, Bakura and Yami quieted and **_civil_** whether they liked it or not.**

**In response then more than one gear was turning on how to achieve such results; these were beings of darkness and half 'evil' and all that crap…getting their cooperation wasn't going to be easy. Plus getting them to feel – maybe threatened wasn't the right word? – enough to do as told, never mind getting them to co-operate with each other, would be difficult…especially the less than sane driven duo of Bakura and Marik.**

**What could they do that wouldn't result in dire repercussions?…It wasn't such a desperation that Yugi wished to break his treasure or Ryou and Malik wanted to encase their items in solid stone or anything like that. Nor to permanently ruin any and all potential relationships with their others…it was more to make them realise how much their constant onslaught was driving everyone apart…even between them and their own lights! An issue they were utterly failing to recognise. **

**They couldn't completely avoid one another; going to the same school, having the same friends, interests and all, nor should they have to.**

**And anyway, just about everyone wanted payback; Malik being Malik and Jou being the naturally hot-headed one anyway went one step further and actually called it vengeance, though everyone admitted it would be insanely fun, funny and maybe **_just_** a little hilarious to stop their rampage cold. Especially if the hikari's stories were anything to go by! **

**Naturally Malik, Ryou and Yugi had replayed the events to the others, demonstrating a deepest regret over a non-existent photo that would have been priceless to hold for like forever. While remembering very vividly the deer-in-the-headlights look their darkness's had shown was a good memento it would have been even better if they could have shown that to everyone else instead of just describing it. Even Isis and Kaiba agreed.**

**All eight knew that would have been a perfect keepsake for a highly embarrassing moment and…whoa…whoa wait… **

"**That's it!"**

"**What's it Jounouchi?"**

"**Embarrass 'em so bad then watch 'em cringe."**

"**Even better, take a photo or something and us it as blackmail!" grinned Malik evilly.**

"**Blackmail? Are you sure that is wise." Ryou said nervously.**

"**It'll be tricky and we will all have to be careful setting up to make sure they don't wriggle out of it" Mai added. **

"**Yeah but not impossible." **

"**But, what can we use? What will humiliate them enough to work?"**

"**That is what we have to discover Anzu" Hiroto chatted.**

"**Umm…" Yugi started, looking to his left.**

"**It needs to be something precise…" interrupted Jou "huh?...what's up Yug?"**

"**just thinking...we should discuss this somewhere more private like the park without…well them" still staring at the arguing yami's, probably trying to put the blame on each other for blowing up the game's machine.**

"**Good point. Hey you actually up for this Yugi? That's a bit surprising."**

"**Why is it surprising Malik? I think it will be fun and who am I to say no to that" he replied winking.**

"**Aaaannnddd…it will be something to remember too!" Malik put in just as everyone started heading off; direction… Domino Park.**

**Only one of the teens was still a little reluctant to follow his peers knowing that this could go incredibly wrong and therefore be quite dangerous to all involved, depending on what they came up with most likely Bakura would not be pleased with his – Ryou's – participation.**

"**You in Ryou?" asked the amethyst eyed teen who had noticed his friend's hesitance from the beginning.**

"…**I'm not sure about this…"**

**Malik wrapped an arm round his white haired friend's shoulders "Why not? You could finally get one up on that yami of yours."**

"**...and it wouldn't be the same without you Ryou" Yugi said joining in on the coaxing.**

"…**you, probably better than anyone else here, know that tomb robber best…"**

"…**and after all you were moaning about head aches and no rest from your aggravated other half again this morning."**

"…**plus! He ruined your favourite sweater with that blood splatter yesterday…"**

"…"

"**Come on fluffy!"**

"**Oh all right. I'm in."**

"**YES!!" (x2 :p )**

'**This is not going to be good…'**

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****Preview: Blueprints of the YGO cast's master plan. With all this planning and some very intuitive darks how is any of this going to see fruit. Yugi shows how well he can 'yami-sit', Ryou goes into full swing involving cameras and cats and the girls come up with a contingency plan that the boys are going to L-O-V-E**

**Note: I know its crap, heck I have half a mind to scrap this chapter and do it again…only I'm not sure HOW to change it (suggestions?). The next will be better promise! There is actually something happening! **

**Reviewer:**

**Black Egyptian Dragon: I know it's not fluffier like I said it might be...I got a bit stumped lol. Glad you liked the 'gunk' attempt at humour though XD**

**CosE. **


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